Identifying Toxic Friendships

How To Identify Toxic Friendships

Building and maintaining friendships is arguably more difficult when we become adults. Meeting new people and developing strong bonds can be a tough challenge. As a result, we often hang onto the friends we make even though those relationships may not be fulfilling. Identifying toxic friendships and making the decision to reevaluate that part of our lives is all part of self-care. These are the three ways your can identify the toxic friendships in your life.

They Drain You

There are many reasons why friendships may drain you; if you’re an introvert you may require far less social interaction than an extreme extrovert. When it comes to toxic friendships, the easiest way to identify them is to focus on how the friendship drains you. Is your friend always negative? Do they make overtly critical remarks? Are they someone who makes cruel comments about you or others? Toxic people typically have insecurities that make them feel inadequate, as a result they project onto other people in the form of nasty criticisms or negative remarks. These can be incredibly hurtful and damaging. When someone is constantly picking at imaginary flaws you can begin to feel worthless. Friends should lift you up not push you down; they should be supportive and encouraging. People who are happy with their lives and confident in themselves feel no need to put others down with spiteful remarks. If a friend is doing this to you or others it’s time to reconsider your relationship.

They Take More Than They Give

Toxic friends demand your attention, clamour for support, and drain your time and energy without giving back. They are only interested in a friendship when they need something or when it’s convenient for them. Pay close attention to those who don't clap when you win. Friendship is about compassion and support, it’s about love and care; it can only work if both sides put in as much as they give out. If someone is always asking you for emotional support or physical resources but fails to be there when you need them, it’s a clear signifier that the friendship is toxic. You deserve nourishing friendships that are mutually beneficial. When someone demands your time and energy, expecting you to be there for them no matter what, yet fails to show up when you need their support, it’s a clear sign they do not value your friendship the way you do theirs.

They Never Admit When They Are Wrong

Admitting when we are wrong, apologising, and learning from our mistakes is one of the cornerstones to all relationships. Even if we didn’t intend to hurt or upset someone, acknowledging when an error has been made and apologising for it is part of a healthy friendship. Toxic friends are never willing to admit when they are wrong or that they made a mistake. They’re unwilling to see how their actions or words have caused someone to feel hurt or upset. Toxic friends will often consider their opinion to be more important and have difficulty accepting someone else’s point of view or advice. Sound familiar? If someone doesn’t value you enough to apologise when they have hurt you, admit when they’ve made a mistake, or consider your opinions are valid; they do not deserve to have you as a friend.

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How To Identify Toxic Friendships